I guess they ran out of “new” stuff to complain about, as today’s AFA “Action Alert” wants me to bitch out McDonald’s (including by complaining to local restaurant managers) about a new side issue stemming from the previous whining about McDonald’s daring to support gay and lesbian community efforts to be more “integrated” in its workforce.

The complaint now? McDonald’s applied for a discount rate for that pro-homosexual summit it sent some employees to earlier this year. Those bastards — not only are they trying to integrate homosexuals into their corporate culture but they’re actually taking advantage of group rates when sending people to conferences. Yeesh.

Sarcasm aside, why exactly is this a specific complaint? If you’re mad about them going to the conference in the first place, that’s fine. But why would you be pissy that they took advantage of a discount? Isn’t saving money a good thing?

Why do dickheads like those running the AFA get to be tax-exempt, anyway? All they’re doing is spewing hate speech. If I claimed to “love God(tm)” would that mean I could solicit (and accept) donations on a tax-free basis to continue running my site? Sigh. I should start my own religion.

Technorati Tags: AFA Politics Stupid People

Because of a stupid hoax sent via e-mail over the past few days, idiots all over Florida are clogging lines at the gas pumps fearing a gas shortage. Gas stations all around Tallahassee are out of gas. They created their own outage.

Thanks, morons. I spent half an hour driving around this town to find a station with some fuel in it. I love how the smart ones that don’t fall for this stupid shit (i.e. me) are the ones who get nailed by it anyway. It’s a hoax, until enough of the dolts out there fall for it that they actually do run on all the gas stations and create a shortage.

Bleh. Morons. Oh yeah — you idiots spiked the local gas price average by a good $0.50 per gallon with this stunt, too. Thanks for that, too.

Technorati Tags: Rants Stupid People

Not that this sad Caylee Anthony case deserves any more media attention, but this leads into one of the topics I’d wanted to start writing more in-depth stories about — my intense dislike for Homeowners Associations (HOAs). This entry was prompted by the news that in response to protesters showing up at Casey Anthony’s place to say their piece, the local HOA there is suing them to make them stop. From the article:

According to the lawsuit: “The association is seeking to reasonably limit the nuisance activities that have caused irreparable harm and damage to the quiet use and enjoyment of the residential neighborhood.”

Technorati Tags: Politics Stupid People

The Large Hadron Collider was successfully activated, tested, and used today. Yeah, that same LHC that quite a few paranoid, moronic wingnuts said would destroy the Earth has been successfully started and used, and we’re still here.

What now, guys? Where’s that thunderous rhetoric about the destruction of the Earth at the hands of microscopic black holes? Where’s the doomsday you were warning about?

All that silence you’re hearing? That’s the sound of thousands of very embarrassed people, hoping to slink away unnoticed to wait for the next “big, scary thing” they can hate, while the rest of us perk up and get excited about the real science being done by real physicists and real engineers … right now.

That silence will soon be replaced by cheers as the scientists doing actual work start learning more about our universe with the help of this giant machine. Feel free to openly mock anyone you know who actually parroted the “we’re going to die because of this machine!” paranoia. It’s okay to point out they were wrong. The sky isn’t falling today.

Technorati Tags: Geeky Science Stupid People

Once upon a time, humanity’s prevailing belief about the Earth’s geography was that the entire world was flat, and that sailing a ship beyond the borders of the known world meant “falling off” the world, encountering dragons, and an assortment of other painful, invariably lethal oddities.

We know the world is round now, because a few people started using reason instead of fear in their explorations of the world. The first people to suggest the world is round were imprisoned and tortured to try to force them to recant. Naturally it was religious groups that did this — terrified that their “perfect” world view was going to be shattered (and that some dumbass idea from their precious bible was about to be proven wrong), they tried to suppress curiosity, exploration, and scientific endeavor.

Technorati Tags: Rants Science Stupid People

In typical government bureaucrat fashion, Transportation Secretary Mary Peters blames those stupid Americans (that’d be you and me) for driving less because gas prices are high — all as the cause for a $200 million shortfall in the federal highway trust fund. You see, we’re not buying as much gas (because we’re doing what we’re supposed to be doing by driving less, and because it’s pricey these days) as we should be, and that’s running the highway coffers dry.

Sorry, everybody. Guess I fucked up the highways.

Technorati Tags: Politics Stupid People

On Fridays I help out at a local business (in Melbourne, FL), and among my duties is answering the telephone when calls come in. The shop gets a lot of telemarketing calls; AT&T is by far the worst offender (they call daily, even on days when the shop isn’t open; on days where someone does answer, they will call up to three times per day), but occasionally others trickle through, too.

Bad news for them. I hate telemarketers. A lot. I am a merciless asshole on a telephone with a telemarketer. I am fiercely proud of this, and I make no apologies for the way I treat telemarketers. I am never rude, never raise my voice, never curse, and in fact I don’t even interrupt. I do, however, ask questions, and get more and more inquisitive as the conversation progresses. I ask the right questions (“who are you?”, “who is your actual employer?”, “what phone number can I call to contact you, or another agent if necessary, to further discuss this product/service?”, “what mailing address can I write to contact your organization with questions or comments?”) so I can figure out who’s being ballsy enough to ignore the Do-Not-Call registry to pester me to buy stuff I don’t need/want, and actually go after the bastards.

Technorati Tags: Ripoffs Scams Stupid People

I laughed my ass off as I noticed an advertisement on TV this evening for “dianetics.org,” a Church of Scientology front (the book “Dianetics” is one of the cult’s more infamous recruitment tricks, especially combined with their “free personality test” tables). The advertisement itself wasn’t the source of the laughter, though it’s a remarkably ineffective ad (it even includes the volcanoes bit that the cult’s “secret scriptures” include in the backstory).

What made me chuckle was that it was aired during a run of South Park. Yeah, the same show that lampoons the cult mercilessly (particularly in Trapped in the Closet which you can go watch by clicking “lampoons the cult”). First they threaten to sue the show’s creators and broadcasters, but now they’re paying Viacom for advertising time? Heh. Morons. I guess if you’re nuts and you’re on the losing side, doing completely bat-shit crazy things is a completely valid tactic.

Be sure to visit Operation Clambake at http://xenu.net/ to read up on all the destructive and horrid things Scientologists have been responsible for over the years they’ve existed. Then laugh next time you see that stupid volcano ad.

Technorati Tags: Religion Stupid People

Get ready for a new generation of ijits, courtesy of a redesigned, more efficient, and cheaper milk bottle. It is apparently superior in every respect, from its stackable design to its cheaper manufacturing costs. Apparently, though, some people can’t figure out how to pour milk from the new design.

How fucking stupid do you actually have to be to have trouble with this? Sure, if it’s different and pours differently, you might get hung up the first time. But how can it continue to be an inconvenience after that? What’s your excuse when you’re still spilling this stuff once you get to gallon #10?

Technorati Tags: Rants Stupid People

A friend of mine lives in an HOA-controlled neighborhood. We’ve joked over the past few months that it won’t likely be very long before the HOA comes pounding on his door bitching about his lawn (which, like most lawns in Central Florida, is browning because of drought conditions). He’s pointed out to me before that an HOA can successfully sue somebody for failing to comply with an instruction to increase watering, even if complying would cause the homeowner to be cited and fined by the city for violating water rationing if it’s imposed.

Well, as it turns out, the power-hungry idiots (not at this specific HOA, but at another one) are doing their best to prove to the world why no one should ever buy a home in a deed-restricted (i.e. HOA “managed”) community: despite the drought, they’re threatening homeowners with fines if they don’t water their lawns.

Keep in mind a threat from an HOA isn’t something you can shrug off for very long — for failing to water your lawn enough to keep it as green as they’d like, they have the power to fine you, then to evict you from your own house (that you bought, mind you). That’s right — an HOA is a contract that rides along with your home’s deed of sale that gives them all sorts of ridiculous, unwanted powers, up to and including throwing you right out on your ass if the bored, lonely busybodies on the board decide to screw with you.

Update: Go snicker as Farkers take on this very subject. It’s always good for (many, many) laughs I love Fark.

Technorati Tags: Politics Stupid People