Call me naive or clueless but I’m genuinely curious why exactly I’m supposed to care that [insert random celebrity here] is pregnant? Why is this shit reported on supposed “news” sites, like Reddit or Digg?

The “news” that “Christina Aguilera is pregnant and naked for her latest magazine cover” scrolled through my Google Reader tonight, and naturally because I’m an idiot American I clicked the link to see what the fine folks over at Digg had to say about it (clicking the link in Reader takes you to the discussion page on Digg, not the actual article). Naturally by the time that page had loaded, there were complaints that the original site hosting the article in question (along with the all-important, entirely non-revealing “nude” pictures of some random celebrity) had croaked.

The comments run the gamut from “who cares?” to “man, I so don’t want her now that she’s pregnant!” to “gimme gimme gimme hot hot hot.”

Memories of Britney Spears’ highly publicized (and apparently widely derided) pregnancies spring to mind, too, when stuff like this crops up. I have to go with the “who cares?” crowd — celebrity or not, women get pregnant. This shouldn’t actually surprise anybody with any kind of brain.

Is there some unwritten rule that says “celebrity women shalt never get pregnant and shalt never get old nor shalt their initial, ‘make-most-men-lust-for-them’ looks ever change?” More to the point, why is anyone at all surprised that the current generation of female “pop stars” is getting knocked up at a frenzied pace? They’re living the high life, raking in money, drinking, having great parties, and they’ve got their pick of boys (and men) to play with. That “wholesome” image that people get in their minds for these girls sure doesn’t flow beyond, well, the minds that imagine them.

To the “don’t want her now that she’s pregnant” crowd, I can only laugh at the intense jealousy such people must feel at the thought that while they were sitting in a basement, having a good wank imagining a sexual encounter with their favorite starlet of the day, some random guy was actually having sex with her. Stings a bit, doesn’t it, fellas? And she’s pregnant, thus it’s not her “job” to be sexually appealing to, well, anybody. Her reproductive organs are “occupied.”

Besides, while I’ve never experienced this myself in life, I have a strong suspicion that when the time comes for me to be a father, the woman carrying my child will continue to be the single sexiest, hottest, and most irresistible woman in my world. And I’ll probably punch you if you try to tell me she’s not attractive, too